Most people’s feelings and thoughts about themselves fluctuate somewhat based on their daily experiences. The grade you get on an exam, how your friends treat you, ups and downs in a romantic relationship-all can have a temporary impact on your wellbeing.
Your self-esteem, however, is something more fundamental than the normal “ups and downs” associated with situational changes. For people with good basic self-esteem, normal “ups and downs” may lead to temporary fluctuations in how they feel about themselves, but only to a limited extent. In contrast, for people with poor basic self-esteem, these “ups and downs” may make all the difference in the world.
People With Poor self esteem Often rely on how they are doing present to determine how they feel about themselves. They need positive external experiences to counteract the negative feelings and thoughts that constantly plague them. Even then, the good feeling (from a good grade, etc.) can be temporary.
Healthy self-esteem is based on our ability to assess ourselves accurately (know ourselves) and still be able to accept and to value ourselves unconditionally. This means being able to realistically acknowledge our strengths and limitations (which is part of being human) and at the same time accepting ourselves as worthy and worthwhile without conditions or reservations.
Our self-esteem develops and evolves throughout our lives as we build an image of ourselves through our experiences with different people and activities. Experiences during our childhood play a particularly large role in the shaping of our basic self-esteem. When we were growing up, our successes (and failures) and how we were treated by the members of our immediate family, by our teachers, coaches, religious authorities, and by our peers, all contributed to the creation of our basic self-esteem.
Self -esteem is Largely developed during Child Hood.
Healthy self-esteem includes. Being praised for something positive, being listened to , being spoken to respectably, where as Low self-esteem includes, Being Criticized harshly by parents or teachers,being beaten..
Before we can begin to improve our self-esteem we must first believe that we can change it. Change doesn’t necessarily happen quickly or easily, but it can happen. we are not powerless! Once we have accepted, or are at least willing to entertain the possibility that we are not powerless, there are three steps we can take to begin to change our self-esteem:
1:, BY giving message to our mind that we can change it.
2: taking help from others, (Feed back)..From friends or family..
3:Avoiding any one who tries to target our self-esteem.